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Online dating services for single men have become a valuable tool for finding love across geographical boundaries and cultures. However, misusing them can give you more heartache than happiness. Follow these online dating tips to navigate your journey to internet romance and protect yourself emotionally and psychologically.
1. Pick Dating Apps Carefully
Dating apps are like social networking sites — they target and attract different audiences.
Tinder has the most extensive user base, and many people use it only for casual hookups. On Bumble, women make the first move, which can be a blessing if you’re uncomfortable sending unsolicited messages. Feeld carves out a niche as a dating site for non-monogamous introverts. MeetMindful gives you access to fewer single individuals, but its size suggests that its users are more interested in settling down than sleeping around.
Online dating services for single men are in the thousands, so choosing the right ones for you can be challenging. You may have to go through trial and error before discovering the crop of online daters you want to interact with, so take your time until you find one or two that suit you.
2. Focus on Quality Over Quantity
Choice matters in dating, but it’s not a numbers game. Connecting with more ladies doesn’t increase your chances of finding love. On the contrary, it can drain you physically and frustrate you emotionally.
Instead, spend your time and energy only on the women you’re into. Your chemistry with someone can improve as you get to know them, but you don’t have to entertain anyone who doesn’t interest you.
Feeling obligated to reply to every soul who slides into your DMs may distract you from connecting with more promising romantic prospects. Ignore and stop responding when your conversation stalls or block or un-match them when you think you’re not a good fit for each other.
3. Be Truthful
Honesty is the foundation of every strong relationship. Use actual, recent photos with no filter showing you doing a fascinating hobby, put legit information in your profile, and be genuine in your conversations.
Never lie about the things you’re insecure about. Sharing less desirable personal qualities may repel some people, but it’s the price of finding the right match for you. Pretending to be someone you’re not is a recipe for disaster. Your partner will know the truth sooner or later and may feel betrayed by your deception.
4. Advertise Zero End Goals
Your profile is a space to help your personality shine through. Mention your interests or passions in as few words as possible and in a friendly and conversational way. Leverage this real estate to display your sense of humor to lure quality prospects interested in dating single men.
A lousy dating app profile broadcasts your romantic goals. If you’re trying online dating for the first time, saying that you want to be married by a particular year or have an X number of children at a specific age is a definite turnoff.
Others may interpret your openness regarding such sensitive details as selfish. You’re already pressuring them to fulfill your unreasonable expectations before they know and fall in love with you.
Instead of advertising your checklist of wants, prove to them that you’re the one first. Only then can you plan your life together and create mutual goals.
5. Use Meaningful Opening Messages
Want to connect with someone on a deeper level? Avoid generic opening lines — like “How’s your day?” and “What’s your pet’s name?”.
No one will come out of their shell when you engage with them with pointless chatter, so quit boring small talk. Ask them something is your responsibility as a man and is your ticket into a serious romantic relationship with a person with substance.
Juicy openers can get into conversations interesting to you with women who want to have them with you. Expect few replies because such questions trim the fat, discouraging noncommittal people from interacting with you.
6. Be Comfortable With Rejection
Unless you have magnetic looks and deep pockets, a number of women will give you a cold shoulder. The sexual marketplace can be brutal, but getting turned down is part of the process — most online dating tips out there don’t emphasize this enough. You must experience it enough to be immune to it. Familiarizing yourself with the feeling of rejection can quell your fear and build your confidence.
Besides, getting ignored doesn’t mean you’re unlovable. Maybe you’re just going after the wrong women or you need to work on yourself to project attractiveness.
7. Limit Your Usage
Spending too much time on dating apps can mess with your head. Messaging someone immediately and frequently makes it seem you have no better things to do. Constantly waiting for replies can agitate you, causing your imagination to run wild and fabricate scenarios to explain noncommunication.
Neediness is repellant to women, so limit your usage to tens of minutes daily. Believe it or not, being less of an attention seeker will result in more attention.
Give them the gift of your absence to preserve your mystique and increase your desirability. Allowing women to miss you can spark attraction, making them excited to get to know you more when you’re back online.
8. Watch Out for Red Flags
Online dating sites are full of lonely people, but they’re also a breeding ground for fraud. Malicious parties recognize that many online daters are emotionally vulnerable and exploit them for their gains.
People who refuse to use realistic photos and have vague profile information — like “Ask me” — can indicate scammers. Legitimate online dating app users must be confident to share sensitive details about them to connect with others. Refusing to do so is sketchy. Fraudsters usually hide in fake identities, gain your trust, and rip you off in one way or another.
Gold diggers on dating sites look for transactional, not romantic, relationships. They aim to make you feel head over heels for them as soon as possible to bilk you. These sweet talkers may confess their love for you within days and blatantly ask you for money due to an emergency once you take their bait.
Apart from fraudsters, beware of people who constantly talk about their exes. They are hung up on their last relationship and waste your time.
Anyone who warns you about themselves is also a headache. Joking about being a sociopath or psychotic is a cause for concern. Ignoring this warning sign may put you at risk, so keep your distance from them.
9. Consult Your Network
Do you have a history of choosing the wrong woman? Maybe you shouldn’t trust your gut as much. Seek advice from the trusted people in your life and hear their thoughts. Seeing your prospective romantic partner through others’ viewpoints can help you discover things your blind spots and biases prevent you.
Did You Find These Online Dating Tips Helpful?
Many real-world love stories start with dating apps. However, using online dating services for single men doesn’t guarantee success.
“Is online dating right for me?” Maybe it is, maybe not.
Either way, treat it as an opportunity to interact with strangers, find what you like and dislike in a partner, and boost your confidence when speaking with women online and in the flesh.
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Author
Jack Shaw is a senior writer at Modded. Jack is an avid enthusiast for keeping up with personal health and enjoying nature. He has over five years of experience writing in the men's lifestyle niche, and has written extensively on topics of fitness, exploring the outdoors and men's interests. His writings have been featured in SportsEd TV, Love Inc., and Offroad Xtreme among many more publications.